Commercial

This language is based off, as the title implies, TV commercials. This language was created by User:Poolala. It's probably Turing complete, but there's no formal proof.

Operations
Comments are simply lines that aren't an operation.

Hello, world!
"Hello, world!" - Satisfied Consumer of Hello

Hello has been selling out worldwide!

Cat program
Jump now 2 dollars off!

Customers are jumping for joy for Jump!

Jump now 0 dollars off!

Input now sold at your local drug store!

Input has been selling out worldwide!

Customers are jumping for joy for Jump!

Implementations
Python implementation by User:TuxCrafting (Note: does not implement loops correctly)